Not became I’m scared. Not brune I’m hurt. But become I’m overwhelmed with him, with the wright of everything tested,
Andrything I haven’t.
car that slices from hit rombone down historio, vanishing under
killed him. The one he barely talks
My hand is resting on his chest, just beside it, not quite brave enough
I look up at him, and 1 schisper, “I’ve had vach an easy life *
He frowem slightly, confused by the shift in toe, but doesn’t speak
“I mean it,” I say, quieter this time. “The worst thing I’ve gone through is Rebecca bring mean to me. Or bleeding toes after rehearsals. And things I chose, I chose ballet, I those that lib. I’ve never had to fight for my survival. Or one friends in the field. Or get
I reach out, trace a fingertip gently along the jagged path on his ribs.
“I feel silly,” I whisper. “Silly being rest to you. You’ve lived a hundred lives. And I’ve Ined this one. Soft and sheltered
Hir eyes stay on mine for a long, heavy moment.
Then be shakes his head slowly, like he doesn’t understand how I could ever think that
He shits, pulls me against him tighter, wrapping both arms around me.
I voice is low, steady, firm. “People like me do what we do so people like you never have to.”
A tear escapes me before I even realize it’s coming. I bury my face in his chest, breathing him in
His warmth. His gilet strength.
1 til my head and glance down again at the scar. ♬ him.
I wipe my eyes and whisper. “What happened to you? That one. The long one.
He doesn’t answer right away. He looks down at it, his expression untradable, like he’s watching the memory play out in the curve of that scar. Like he can
He pulls me cern closer, pressing my cheek against his chest. And then, finally, he speaks
“When we got surrounded, I knew something was off. The guys closing in on un–they didn’t have real gear. No kevlar No helmets, est basic weapon desperation.”
He exhales, jas tightening.
They were never meant to make it out,” he says, “They knew it. We just hadn’t figured it out yet.”
I hold still. Not breathing. Listening
“I told two of my pays–Pulp and Draco to get the package out immediately. I didn’t wait for orders. I just knew.”
I lift my head slightly, confused. “Pulp?”
He almost smiles, a small huff of breath escaping! “Remember Rooster’s story? How he got his name?”
1/3
Chapter 167: Penny
Irod. He was being chased down a food hall naked by a renter. It was so filtrom,
Asher neds. “Not all sun games we had. Pulp me threw a tantrum because there was pop in his range juice. Even though
1 Nisk “You’re kidding.”
“It made everyone laugh so hand,” he says, voice taller now. “Even our CO. So the nome mork. (nice Pulp. Pulp *
“And Draco?” 1 nk.
He shrugs. “Whim blend kid. Liked Hany Potter. We thought it was
That almost makes me laugh. Almost
But then I catch the shift in his voice. Not H. Wal.
My chest tightens
I don’t ask, Not yet. I don’t have to.
He leans forward, presses his forehead to mine, and closes his eyes
I know without words that Draco didn’t make it. That Pulp might didn’t either.
And that this man, this strong, scared, impossibly beautiful man holding me, carries more grief than I can comprehend
So I don’t speak,
I just stay right there. Wrapped up in him. In his silence. In his pain. In the truth of it
And in the fact that he’s still here.
Still alive.
He says, “Anyway,” like he’s brushing the edge of something sharp. But I can hear it in his voice–whatever comes next, it’s branded into him. His eyes aren’t really here anymore. They’re back there, in the valley
“They managed to get the person out,” he says. “Ran him toward Night and Smoke. The whole thing was such a mess no one noticed at first, so they got him
out clean.”
Ieshale slowly. “That’s good, right?”
His jaw benses.
“That’s when the real chaus started,” he says.
My stomach
“There were more of them. At least three, maybe four times as many. We were doing okay–managing, holding ground. But then they dropped snake, Thick, heavy, everywhere. And they pushed us against the valley wall. We lost two guys in the confusion.” He paises. “There was nothing we could do.”
I reach for his hand without thinking. I just need to touch him. To anchur
He doesn’t look at me. His eyes are still somewhere else. Somewhere 100 far from here.
7/3
Chapter 167: Penny
“I told everyone to stay still. I den I know why. Instinct, maybe. But I felt something shift. The air. The ground. 11) like he’s ashamed to speak this part. “And they listened. For a second, I thought maybe we’d make it not?
“But then Pulp and Draro came back. His wider tracks just a little, but enough for ma They didn’t”
“They got shot mid–sprint, Dropped instantly.” His hand grips mine tighter. “And that’s when it happened –
I don’t ask what it is. I don’t need to.
His breath leaves him like it’s laced with lead. The explosion leveled the ridge. Took out most of the enemy set. But it took Palp. Dean. And am mave:
Six gone. Just like that.
I can barely breathe.
“There were five of us left,” he says finally. His voice is steady again, but I know
I know better now. 11
what it’s costing him to hold it together.
I want to cry, but I don’t. I can’t. Not when he’s here beside me, alive. Not when he’s carrying this much. I lean into him instead, pressing my face to his shoulder, wrapping my arms around his waist.
He lets me. Quiet now. Heavy.
And
then I whisper, “I’m so sorry, Asher.”
Chapter Comments
