Chapter 114: Christina
Christina
Finals week is as grueling as I expected. They don’t make it easy, it shouldn’t be. Alphas have the lives of every member of their pack in their hands. They need to take that seriously, to understand the responsibility that comes with being an Alpha, so they can effectively run and manage their packs.
On Monday, Ezra defeated me to get the ten points in Best in Sparring. It was a hard–won battle, but in the end, he was the winner. He was a good sport about it, and everyone else congratulated both of us on being such strong competitors.
Sebastian had come up and congratulated Ezra on the win, and as briefly as possible, told me that I did very well. I know I was the one who asked for space but shit it’s so hard to see him when I still feel so raw.
I can feel his eyes on me at all hours of the day. I know he’s desperate to talk to me and I know that time is coming quickly when I’ll have to make a decision, but he’s respecting my need to focus this week.
Not that it’s easy to focus. I’m struggling to sleep every night, and everyone has seen the strain I’m under. On Tuesday, the Lunas corner me in the kitchen, wanting to know what
happened. I tearfully tell them, getting hugs and support for all of them.
“For what it’s worth, Christina, he looks as bad as you do,” Sylvie
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says.
“I know you’re in the middle of finals weeks, Christina, but don’t make any decisions until you’ve had some space. Get away from all of this and think about what YOU want and what YOU can live with next week between semesters,” Mia said.
“I imagine right now it feels hard to breathe. Go home. Talk to your brother. Get some clarity about what you want in life and how you can obtain that. There are a lot of doors that will be open for you now, even more than before,” Luna Jo says.
By Wednesday, Tyler and Ezra corner me on our morning run, waiting until we’re as far away from the dorms as possible. before forcing me to talk.
“I broke the first rule of being an assistant. I fell in love with the instructor,” I say. I’ve cried more in the last few days than I have since I lost my parents. I’m not a crier by nature, but I just can’t seem to stop.
“Did he tell you he doesn’t love you? Because he acts like he does,” Tyler says.
“We’ve never said it to each other. I don’t know if he doesn’t feel the same or if he was waiting, but now…” I look up at these two men who are as much brothers to me as Dane is.
“Now you don’t want to go from one shadow to another,” Ezra
says.
“Exactly. Maybe I would feel differently if I hadn’t gone through the classes this semester, if I hadn’t realized what it meant to be in Dane’s shadow. But I’m not the same person I was ten weeks ago, and I can’t go back to being that person again.”
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“What are you going to do?” Tyler asks.
“Luna Mia suggested taking this week away to decide what I want. I think I need to space to clear my head and figure out exactly what it is that I want to do,” I say.
“You’ll see us next week at Tyler’s party. You can give us an update then and if you need to talk, we’ll be there,” Ezra says. “Well, I’ll be there. Tyler will hopefully find his mate and be very busy,” he says chuckling.
“I’ve already found my mate,” he says quietly. “For me, my birthday will just confirm what I already know.”
“I hope so. The two of you are really good together,” I tell him.
By Friday, all of the tokens have been given out. Not surprisingly, Ezra won best for Finance, Managing the Pack, and overall Sensory, which left me the ten points for Best in Hearing. Tyler won for Best in Smell, and Liam won for Best in Sight. I got the points for the Communication class and Tyler got them for Dealing with Crisis.
By Saturday, there’s a lot of excitement. As heartbroken as I still feel about everything going on with Sebastian, it’s hard not to be excited about the fact that three of us made it to the leaderboard.
The assistants, under Haley’s direction put together a feast and baked a cake for our graduation. The mood is festive and a bit sad. We’ve all grown really close this semester, even Logan became part of the group after he finally engaged in the program. We all know he didn’t pass, but I know he will next semester.
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As dinner winds down, Alpha James stands. He and the other instructors sat together at one table and the rest of us spread out amongst the others. This is typical. At graduation, the instructors present a unified front to present the total points for the Alphas.
“First, I’d like to thank our instructors for joining the Academy this semester. I know it’s hard to be away from your mates and families, but it’s important for our future generation that we give our time to help them be successful. To our instructors,” Alpha James says.
We all clap as they stand and then begin clapping for each. other. Once they sit, Alpha James begins again.
“Without further ado, let’s talk points. I am humbled and privileged to announce that three of our Alphas made it to the leaderboard this semester. Sebastian and I looked it up and there is no recorded history of this ever happening at the Academy. Well done!”
Everyone begins clapping again, as Erza, Tyler, and I look at each other. Our numbers are very, very close.
“First, Alpha Logan. You already know that we’ll be seeing you again next semester.”
“Yes, Alpha,” he says.
“I look forward to seeing what you accomplish now that you’ve put your mind to it,” Alpha James says to him.
“Thank you, Alpha. I won’t let you down.”
“I know you won’t. So, coming in at one hundred and two points,
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congratulations Alpha Noah,” he says, holding out a certificate. Noah walks up and takes it, shaking the instructors‘ hands before hugging Luna Jo, who smiles like a proud mom.
We all congratulate him as he returns to his seat, then Alpha James continues. “Coming in at one hundred and ten points, Alpha Liam, congratulations!”
Liam jogs up, pumping his fist in the air as we cheer and laugh. He shakes the instructors‘ hands and hugs Mia before coming back to our table.
“Now for you three,” Alpha James says, looking over at me, Tyler, and Ezra. “Before this semester, there were twenty points separating first and fifth place on the leaderboard, three points between first and second place. Now, there are only six points separating first and fifth place,” he says, having to stop at the appreciative whistles that go up around the room, “and only three points separating first and third place. You assholes bumped my son off the leaderboard. I have to go home and tell him that,” he says, making us all laugh. Then he looks at Tyler. “But you also bumped your brother off the leaderboard, and nearly bumped your brother off the leaderboard,” he says, looking at me.
I glance at Tyler, knowing he feels the impact of that as strongly as I do.
“So, coming in at one hundred and fifty–one points and number three on the leaderboard, Alpha Ezra.
We all stand and cheer as he walks up. For the leaderboard, you not only get the certificate, but you also get a large gold number with your leaderboard rank on it. Ezra shakes everyone’s hand and hugs Charlotte before coming to sit down amongst our
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group.
“Coming in at one hundred and fifty–two points, second on the leaderboard and the first woman to ever get her name on the leaderboard, Alpha Christina.”
I stand, as the others cheer for me, walking up to Alpha James first. “Congratulations. I knew you could do it. Your brother will be very proud,” he says, handing me the certificate and my gold number two.
I thank the other instructors and the assistants, saving Sebastian for last.
“Thank you, Sebastian. I couldn’t have done this without you,” I say truthfully.
“Of course you could have. You did this, all I did was give you a little nudge to get you going,” he says. I debate for half a second, then open my arms to hug him. His response is instant, and he pulls me into his embrace, holding me tightly.
I simultaneously feel something tighten and relax in my body. Being in his arms feels so right, but it also hurts, knowing that I may never feel his arms around me again after tonight. I pull away long before I’m ready to, smiling before going to sit back down.
“And finally, with one hundred and fifty–three points, our new number one on the leaderboard, Alpha Tyler!”
He smiles, getting up and going to get his certificate and golden number, shaking hands with the instructors and then lifting Haley off the ground and spinning her around as she laughs and cries at the same time.
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