92 Chapter 95
Chapter 95- Heart’s Confession Over Cocktails
“I think I’m falling for Damien Sterling.”
The words tumbled out of my mouth before I could stop them, hanging in the air between Victoria and me like the steam from our cocktails. We’d moved our heart–to–heart from the snowy
family RV, where she round to the luxurious interior of Victoria’s
insisted on making her signature pomegranate martinis.
Victoria’s eyes widened slightly, then a knowing smile spread across her face. “Well, it’s about dam
time you admitted it.”
I groaned, slumping back against the plush leather couch. “Is it that obvious?”
“Hazel, sweetie,” Victoria leaned forward, her expression sympathetic but amused, “a blind person could see the chemistry between you two. Every time someone mentions. his name, your face does this thing-” she gestured vaguely at my face “-like you’re trying not to smile but failing miserably.”
I buried my face in my hands. “God, I’m such a mess. I told him I wasn’t ready. I actually rejected him, Vic.”
Victoria nearly choked on her drink. “You did what? When? How did I not know about
this?”
I took a long sip of my martini, welcoming the burn as it slid down my throat. Outside, I could hear Lisa and Emma still giggling as they perfected their snowmen competition, their voices muffled by the falling snow.
“It happened about a week ago,” I admitted. “He told me how he felt. Said he’d been waiting for me to be ready. And I just… panicked.”
Victoria shifted closer, tucking her legs underneath her. “What exactly did you say to
him?”
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I closed my eyes, replaying that moment in my mind. The intensity in Damien’s gaze. The gentle but determined tone of his voice as he’d finally laid his feelings bare.
“I told him I couldn’t be what he needed,” I said softly. “That my life is too complicated
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right now with my father in prison, my recent divorce from Julian, and all the baggage I’m carrying. I told him someone like me would only tarnish his family’s reputation.”
Victoria’s disapproving tsk made me open my eyes. “Hazel Ashworth, that is the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard.”
“It’s not ridiculous,” I protested. “It’s realistic. His family is practically American royalty. I’m the daughter of a criminal, with a failed marriage and a business that’s just finding its footing. The tabloids would have a field day.”
“And you think Damien Sterling, the man who orchestrated a city–wide drone show just to make you smile, gives a damn about tabloids?” Victoria challenged. “He knows exactly who you are and where you come from. He’s not some naive schoolboy who hasn’t thought this through.”
I swirled the remaining liquid in my glass, watching the pomegranate seeds dance at the bottom. “There’s more to it than that. I told him I needed to focus on my career right now. That I couldn’t afford distractions.”
Victoria’s eyebrow shot up. “And he’s just a distraction?”
“No!” I answered too quickly. “I mean… I don’t know. Every time I’m with him, I can barely think straight. He makes me feel things I didn’t know I could feel anymore.”
“Terrifying, isn’t it? Victoria’s voice softened with understanding. “To realize that you actually might get a second chance at happiness after believing it was all over.
Tears pricked at the corners of my eyes. “I’m scared, Vic. What if I’m just rebounding? What if this is just my wounded heart latching onto the first person who showed me kindness after Julian’s betrayal?”
Victoria reached over and refilled our glasses with the remainder of the cocktail.
shaker. “Hazel, honey, it’s been over a year since Julian showed his true colors. That’s plenty of time to know the difference between gratitude and genuine attraction.”
I took another drink, letting the tart sweetness sit on my tongue. “But look at the timing of everything. Damien showed up right when my world was falling apart.
“Or, Victoria countered, pointing her olive skewer at me for emphasis, “the universe finally decided to give you something good after putting you through hell. Did you
ever think of that?”
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I hadn’t. The idea that I might actually deserve happiness with someone like Damien felt foreign, almost forbidden.
“Tell me something,” Victoria continued, settling deeper into the couch. “What exactly are you afraid of? That he’ll hurt you like Julian did? That he’ll change his mind when things get tough?”
I stared out the window at the snow–covered landscape, trying to articulate the fear that had been growing inside me. “I’m afraid I’ll disappoint him,” I finally admitted. “That one day he’ll wake up and realize I’m not worth all the trouble. His grandfather already disapproves of me. What if the rest of his family eventually feels the same?”
“Has his mother or sister given you any indication they feel that way?”
“No,” I had to admit. “Chloe has been nothing but supportive, and Mrs. Sterling has been surprisingly warm.”
“So it’s just your insecurities talking.” Victoria concluded. “Look, Hazel, you’re allowed to be scared. After what you’ve been through, it would be weird if you weren’t. But don’t let fear cost you something that could be amazing.”
I fidgeted with the stem of my glass. “He told me he’s been patient but he won’t wait forever. He basically said if I tried to date someone else, he’d take ‘drastic measures.
Whatever that means.”
Victoria’s eyes lit up. “Ooh, possessive Damien is hot Damien. What did you
he said that?”
say whe
“Nothing useful. I just hung up, I confessed, feeling a blush creep into my cheeks. “But the way he said it… it didn’t feel controlling or threatening. It felt like he was just being honest about how much he wants me.”
“And how did that make you feel?” Victoria pressed, her tone turning serious.
“Like I was valuable,” I whispered. “Like I was worth fighting for.”
Victoria nodded slowly. “Julian never made you feel that way, did he?”
“No,” I agreed. “With Julian, l’always felt like I was the one who had to prove myself worthy of his love. I was the one making sacrifices, giving my blood, planning our life together. With Damien, it feels… different. Equal, somehow, even though our situations. couldn’t be more different.”
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“Then why are you sitting here with me instead of telling him how you feel?” Victoria asked gently.
I let out a shaky breath. “Because what if I’m wrong? What if I’ve misread everything? My track record with men isn’t exactly stellar.”
“Your track record consists of one douchebag who didn’t deserve you,” Victoria corrected. “And Damien Sterling is nothing like Julian Grayson. Not even close.”
She was right. Where Julian had been weak and easily manipulated, Damien was solid and unwavering. Where Julian had abandoned me when I needed him most, Damien had appeared exactly when I thought all was lost.
“I think I love him,” I whispered, the revelation hitting me with startling clarity. “Not just attraction or gratitude. I think I actually love him.”
Victoria smiled, clinking her glass against mine. “Well, hallelujah. The penny finally drops.”
“But what do I do now?” I asked, suddenly feeling like a teenager with her first crush. “I already rejected him. I can’t just call him up and say, ‘Hey, I changed my mind, let’s be together!“”
“Why not?” Victoria shrugged. “Men like directness. And Damien Sterling strikes me as someone who appreciates honesty above all else.”
I imagined calling Damien, hearing his deep voice on the other end of the line. What would I even say? The thought made my stomach flutter with anxiety.
“I need time to think about how to approach this,” I said. “I can’t mess it up again.”
“Fair enough,” Victoria conceded. “But don’t overthink it. Sometimes the simplest approach is best.”
The door to the RV suddenly burst open, letting in a gust of cold air and the sound of laughter as Lisa and Emma tumbled inside, cheeks flushed and covered in snow.
“You have to come see our masterpieces!” Lisa exclaimed. “I made a snow–woman who looks exactly like my horrible boss.”
“And I made a suspiciously handsome snow–man who might bear a resemblance to a certain Mr. Sterling” Emma added with a sly grin in my direction.
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Victoria shot me a knowing look before turning to our friends. “We’ll be right out. Just finishing our girl talk.”
After they’d closed the door behind them, Victoria turned back to me. “So what’s your plan?”
I took a deep breath, feeling something settle inside me. A decision, perhaps. Or maybe Just acceptance of what I’d been fighting for too long.
“I don’t know exactly. But I’m done running from these feelings. I’m done pretending I don’t care about him when I clearly do.”
Victoria’s smile widened. “That’s my girl.”
“Right, so let’s go with the flow and stop struggling!” I declared, raising my empty glass in a mock toast, feeling lighter than I had in months.
Whatever happened next with Damien, at least I was finally being honest with myself. And right now, that felt like enough.
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