Chapter 98
Axel
I stand on the balcony of the east tower, watching the sunrise smear gold over the skies like it’s trying to apologize for the cold night.
The view should brighten my day, make me smile at least, but no. My shoulders are stiff.
I haven’t slept.
70230
(15)
The armor on my chest feels too clean. The insignia too new. High Commander of the Outer Guard. That’s what they are calling me now. Eden insisted take the role, said I earned it. Said she trusted me.
And I do feel proud… I think.
Hard to tell. I know that I should be proud, but there is something about the way the way the guards bow when I walk by, that makes my skin itch.
Because I’m not sure I know what I’m guarding anymore. I’m powerful, but Azriel? He is a monster. Good guy, sure, but an absolute beast when it comes to fighting and that makes me wonder if I’m needed.
“You’re so silly!”
I glance to my right. Eden is hugging Azriel in the garden, her little head with the red messy hair resting against his chest. He is brushing his long fingers through her hair, smiling like the world is his.
It is.
He is safe and she is happy.
And me? I’m still tethered to ghosts. Still very much in love with the woman that never will be mine.
For fuck’s sake, why can’t I stop thinking about her?
I try to push her out, but it becomes impossible when she walks up to me with a big smile on her adorable face.
“You should rest,” she says, immediately noticing something is off. “Even werewolf warriors need sleep, Axel.”
I want to scream. Instead I smile. “Maybe tonight.”
She smiles like she doesn’t believe me. She is probably right.
Because every time I close my eyes, I see a face I shouldn’t be seeing.
Not Eden’s.
Not Azriel’s.
Hers.
Elvira.
It doesn’t make sense. I haven’t seen her in this timeline. Haven’t spoken her name. Haven’t even thought of her outside of the shame she draped over Eden like a second skin.
But she keeps showing up.
In dreams that don’t feel like dreams. Chained. Bruised. Angry. Crying without sound. I see her in a dungeon that smells like moss on wet stone and betrayal, and I can’t reach her. Can’t touch her. Can’t breathe without tasting rust.
And every time I wake up, I’m furious.
Because why her?
Why now?
I’m in love with Eden and although that’s completely one–sided since she is mated to Azriel I sure as hell don’t want Elvira!
What’s wrong with the moon goddess?!
“My life is seriously fucked up…”
I run my palm down the stone railing and let the grit bite into my skin. I don’t trust Elvira Don’t like her either. That little blonde brat stabbed Eden in the back when she needed her most, and I carry that like I carry my title–with a weight that never lifts.
But still, the dreams come.
Still, I hear her voice in the wind.
Axel.
Not a plea. Not a whisper.
A demand.
Like she knows I’m trying to ignore it.
Like she knows I can’t.
I blink, and suddenly I’m not on the balcony anymore. I’m standing in the woods at night, hands bloody, breath fogging. A flicker of blonde hair. A scream that never reaches the surface. Her voice again.
“Why didn’t you come?”
I shake it off like smoke.
None of this makes sense. I’m not hers. She is not mine. Eden is the one I would have burned the world for. Elvira is the reason Eden bled in the first
place.
But something’s wrong.
Something’s pulling.
And I’m starting to think it’s not just a dream.
The training yard is quiet this morning.
Usually there is chatter. Banter between guards, the clang of swords, the thud of bodies meeting dirt. But today, it’s all clipped orders and quick glances. Like they are waiting for something to happen.
Or maybe I’m just projecting.
“Commander.”
I turn. One of the younger soldiers, Rien, I think, is standing at attention. His eyes travel up to meet mine and then away again. The new recruit is way too cautious and probably not able to hurt a fly.
“What is it?” I ask.
“We finished patrol rotations for the western border. No unusual activity, sir.”
Inod. “Good. Double the sweep near the stream. That section’s vulnerable.”
“Yes, sir.” He salutes and disappears like he is relieved to be dismissed.
I want to chew his head off.
I want to punch myself for getting irritated.
“What’s wrong with me?”
I rub my temple. I shouldn’t be this on edge. There is no threat here. No war. The palace is thriving. The wards are solid. And yet-
The flicker again.
My hand stills.
I see it fully in my head, just a flash. A hallway lined with mold, a chain dragging over stone. Her voice again. Just one word.
“Please.”
My grip tightens around the report scroll I’m holding. I blink, and the vision fades.
Damn it.
Back in my office, I try to focus. The room smells like parchment and old wood. My desk is stacked with tactical reports, border assessments, and updates from the inner court. Everything that should make me feel secure.
It doesn’t.
I read the same sentence three times before slamming the report shut.
My dreams shouldn’t bleed into my days.
And yet here I am, trying to catch my breath like I’ve just fought someone.
Or worse.
Like I’m being haunted by someone I let die.
Even though I didn’t.
Even though I shouldn’t care.
I grit my teeth and lean back in the chair, watching the light shift across the floor. I know what this is. I’ve seen it before. When the mate bond starts to pull from a distance. It starts with dreams. Flickers. A voice you can’t forget. A phantom pain in your chest.
I’ve seen wolves go half–mad from it.
But this shouldn’t be happening to me.
Not with her.
I close my eyes and lean my head back. The whisper comes again, clear as daylight:
“I’m still here.”
And I hate that I want to answer.
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